New York Times writer Susan Silas published a very personal and prophetic piece about single moms having sex. The article entitled “Sex on the Run? No, We Parked” was published in October 2010. The essence of the story is about how we as single moms attempt to balance a romantic life and sustain saintly motherhood all at the same time. It’s a snapshot into her personal trials and tribs of living in cramped quarters, protecting her child from her private proclivities and still managing to have a satisfying adult sex life! She found the only privacy was the backseat of a car parked in various locations around New York City.
According to Ms. Silas it seems in order to protect our children from the realities of our life we must behave like we did as errant teenagers. Her story is a cleverly written homage to modern adult love. She shares techniques and locations in and around the city where she and her lover would “do there thing” to avoid being caught in the act by her 7 year old daughter. Although the thought of a 40 something adult being relegated to having sex in the backseat of a car may be surprising or even shocking to some, there is validity to her extreme act. Being a single mother tests us in ways we never imagined.
Sharing with the little ones
Though I never had sex in a car with a lover when my children were little, there were and continue to be many adult “activities” that I keep secret (aka: sneak around) from my daughters. In fact, just like Silas I marvel at certain sly behaviors I’ve readopted from my youth. I remember sitting on the couch downstairs with my boyfriend while my parents were upstairs in their bedroom watching TV. We’d stretch to second base all the while ears perked for the slightest sign of adult like footsteps hitting the staircase. And now 30+ years later I am sitting on the couch downstairs with my guy canoodling, while my teens are nestled in their bedrooms upstairs, listening intently for a door to open and footsteps to cross the hallway. Or another of my favorite sneaky behaviors; going out into the backyard and not turning on the patio lights so we can make-out minus beady teen eyeballs patronizing our jejune act.
Discretion is the better part of valor
Definition. It’s good to be brave, but it is also good to be careful. If you are careful you will not get into situations that in this case will be awkward to explain. As a single mom there is a fine line between how long you know a man and when you invite him into your life. There is another fine line between how long you have that same man in your children’s consciousness and when you invite him into your bedroom while your children are home.
Be prudent and lock your door.
Do you have a great childish adult act of romance to share? We wanna hear!